Be forewarned: Long entry ahead...
Many moons ago, I picked up the old film SLR I didnt realize we had at home and started shooting with friends. Eventually, an SLR was on the list of my “Things to bring to work on a daily basis”, along with my wallet, cellphone and kikay kit.
When people I met in photography forums started talking about digital photography, I dreamed of owning my own DSLR someday. In the meantime, I concentrated on Aperture, Shutter and Composition. I never felt that I would go into Photography as a career primarily because unlike those around me, I never felt that the talent came naturally. It was something that I had to work hard on in order to achieve results. I argued that I was already working hard on programming skills for my day job, I think getting into another profession where I have to exert a lot of effort on 24/7 would drive me crazy. One at a time only please, one at a time.
So photography was the fun, creative learning part, whereas work was the more serious, learning part. Doing both eventually proved beneficial, as I finally bought my very own digital SLR, Buddy in 2004.
And then I started to really get older. By that I mean, I started getting more responsibilities at home. So Buddy never got any new playmates, save for a basic flash and a 28-105 lens, both secondhand. Ultra-wides were top of my “want” list, but I just couldnt get them...so again, I concentrated on taking my kit 300D and secondhand gear to wherever work took me and took as many photos as I can, however I can, the best that I can.
While all of this was happening, entry-level digital SLRs started popping out left and right, and I feared that Buddy would eventually go obsolete. I made the decision to sell Buddy, partly because I needed the finances, partly because I wanted to make sure that he still had value when I sell him and partly because I wanted to do something drastic to force me to upgrade. So Buddy went along with the kit lens and flash. And since then, I’ve never owned a camera.
Up until my 30th birthday.
Its the single most expensive gift anyone (parents excluded) has ever given me. That, plus the fact that it IS the single most relevant gift that anyone can ever give me. I’ve never been able to replace Buddy because of so many reasons, yet I’ve always, always, always wanted to get myself a new DSLR. For the longest time, I would go to places and attend events and I would always feel that one thing was missing....my DSLR. In the year and a half without a camera, I fear I’ve lost the little talent I’ve worked so hard to acquire and I’ve always been fearful at the back of my mind that I no longer have a creative and fun bone in my body. Photography was my fun, creative, adventurous side. Without a camera, I am just your plain working girl. 9-to-5-or-so job on weekdays (and usually beyond) and Tita-turned-mommy-turned-household-help on weekends.
Now that I have this still unnamed new toy in my life, I can start re-learning photography again, I have reason to start exploring places that can be captured in photos, and I can re-learn how to see things differently again. I'd be starting from scratch, but I dont really mind. At least I'm starting from somewhere.
Thank you. You've turned my birthday into the milestone it really should be. With every photo I take, I will always be reminded of how much thought (and cash!) you've put into getting me this gift.
