time for a change?

I've been contemplating making some blog changes.
I love my four year old blog, but given that it is four years old, I think some overhaul is called for.

However, these things need to be planned out and planning takes time. And time is something that's a little tricky to find these days. For starters, I have 50 hours of my week for the next month all booked, plus I have to re-schedule and find time for gym, sports and hopefully, swim and drive classes in the future.

I've had people at home tell me that I spent too little time at home already, and that I should plan to be just at home....but really, the choices I've made thus far only mean that I can still spend time for myself outside the house! When I've settled down and have other matters to attend to, then it means I'm ready to spend more time indoors. But for now, I'd like to think I have license to be outside as much as I want to.

But, back to the original topic (I tend to veer in the direction of other frustrating things lately....) I need a new look, a new feel and a new blog entry style. I have enough stress and negativity day in and day out, I need to be optimistic at least in one aspect.

And thats where the new blog comes in. At least if people see me frowning 8 (or more) hours a day, they can turn to my blog and see the hint of smile and good vibe somehow (hopefully).

29 years old.
No big deal.
I just wish I can wear that around my neck so some people can remember.
myself (sometimes) included.

so many things I have to (want to, must) do.
so little...everything.

Whats the craziest thing you've ever done on an impulse? I dont think I've done anything worth sharing, but I'm pondering on doing one. But that breaks the bank. Poor piggy musn't be starved anymore. After all, she's been through more than enough food disorders already.

Yesterday I waged a successful war against the lazy bug, and won. Until I got up and stopped fighting --- I realized then that I was reeling from the side effects. Lightheaded, weak and not-myself. Victory was short-lived. Today I am defeated. Tomorrow I will attempt yet again.

I seem to count my days in weekends. This one to be spent with a shortlists of lets-try-to-do-this with the next one waiting with its prescheduled whirlwind. After that its the weekend before next month. After that its a blur of weekends before christmas.

How many days before the next year? Let me count the weekend ways. I'm running out of time, next thing you know, my list of "things to do on a weekend" will be full, with my 2007 weekends all gone.

Sigh. A tiny knock on my open door and a voice of a little person waking me up. I love 'em little people, but my little world's starting to crowd up. Please, stop giving me too much to think about. I chose not to be crowded, yet, ironically, they seem to think its reason to crowd me some more.
"Oh you got room in there, honey? Here, have a piece of someone else's pie. They took more than they can swallow, I'll pass it on to you."

I've gone mad you must think. I say, "Moo.".

i wish...

...that there were more long weekends like the one just past. Then I'd have more time to learn how to surf.

...that La Union werent that far away, then I'd have more time to learn how to surf.

...that I can swim like fish so that when I have more time to learn how to surf, I can progress to bigger waves and deeper waters :D

In the meantime, I'll just have to be content with the fact that I did get up on the board and that I did ride the wave for a bit. Form, better balance, smooth movements and more wave-riding time should (hopefully) follow next.


Oh and also better surf outfits! haha!

La Union, we will be back!! :D

IT has arrived.

It used to be just a "thought". An abstract idea that had no real form, nothing concrete to really back it up. I knew faintly that it would possibly come true eventually. But when that would happen, I had no idea. It always belonged to the realm of the great unknown "someday".

Until I got a wake up call this morning --- no, actually, it wasnt just a wake up call. It was a resounding wallop right smack on the back of my head, knocking me senseless.

Its here.
The 40D has arrived.

There will be a trail of drool following me around from now on...

happenings happenings

Having neglected my blog for weeks(months?), its only natural to have a few "major" events within those no-blog days. An update of things I've done -- significant or otherwise.

1. DIVE! Well, Introductory Dive palang. But I've tried it and though I was scared initially and I had to consciously remind myself to not panic and breathe all throughout, I DID IT! Wahooo!!! Next step: Dive class.

2. PINATUBO! Okay, this happened MONTHS ago, even before my blog MIA days. But I didnt get to update my list (see corner of my blog)...thats one more thing OFF my (incomplete) list. Number 1 wasnt even in there..hmm...

3. AVILON ZOO! Similar to number 2, this happened a while back already, but I dont think I've posted anything related to it on my blog..I think. Again, another one off my list! (Refer to aforementioned little list).

and while I wait for my next surge of energy and creativity that will make me go "EUREKA! This is what I HAVE to do today!"....I'll post a photo of myself with my winged little pal (whose name I cannot remember).

the perfect beach buddy!

*Updated! -- OOPS! My bad....asking price is only 16K!

If you love the water and wish that your digital camera (or phone camera) loves it as much as you do....then you need a camera that can go near and yes, even under the water with you.

Ixus 50 with All-weather case -- guaranteed to keep your camera safe even up to a depth of 3 meters!

Secondhand, in good condition and for 16K, you'll get:

• the camera (of course!)
• the all-weather case (of course!)
• the original box with manual, charger, usb and video cables
• not one, but TWO camera batteries
• 256 MB SD card
• leather case (for when you're not near the water)

If you're interested, send me an email at socsdiego@yahoo.com

an old entry found

I found text of something I meant to post last year, but somehow this never made it to my blog. Its not even finished yet...I'd attempt to end it, but not being in the same frame of mind would just make it confusing...so I'll post it the way it is.

Written sometime October last year, after the office move.

A few of my officemates have written about the now current office move from the prestigious building-in-CBD to the yet-to-be-discovered other-building-elsewhere, I thought it might be a good idea to write about my early days...

At the risk of revealing my relatively old but really still very young age, I am one of the handful of people in the company who have experienced an office move. Five years ago, I walked into a dark, old, insconpicious building in Makati for a job interview, clad in borrowed officewear (at the time I was working in an almost casual environment) and tried my best to impress our then HR manager. A few months later, I was back again for Pre Employment Training where we spent three months cooped up in an airconditioned Conference Room with closed off windows enduring session after session of lectures and training exercises. Eventually, six of us were successfully accepted into the company...and we started to fully appreciate the positive vibe and familiarity that everyone had with everyone else in the company. It was intimate back then, we were probably 60 in all, with 20 or so out of the country most of the time. But everyone would be invited to dinners and lunches, Bowling games meant the women were pitted against men and the losing team would pay for dinner, Counterstrike games were conducted in the office after hours and each team would huddle together for pre-game strategy meetings and everyone screams at everyone else during the game, Friday nights usually mean alcohol and Andok's in the tiny pantry, Birthday celebrants for the month would buy lunch (and/or merienda) for everyone, and Coca Cola purchases would mean taking a bottle out of the fridge and marking it on Orly's list for collection on payday.

It then changed to half a floor in buiding-in-CBD where we were the only ones using the set of elevators servicing the 23rd and other floors, we had an office where most if not all the furniture were imported directly from who knows where, the chairs were all named after some guy who promised full lumbar support, drip coffee was replaced with an espresso machine, Coca Cola was expanded to Snapple, Gatorade, Cafe Mocha (all for free), everyone was a Ping Pong newbie, sunset views of Roxas Boulevard was not blocked by a Call Center building and Condominium, and, though it was harder to leave for lunch during Theme Fridays, we all still fit quite well into a single group photo with everyone crowding in the reception area. Despite those changes though, it was still relatively easy to walk from one end to the other of the office and invite everyone to dinner and/or drinks on Friday nights.

Mid Year New Year

Six months into 2007 and what happened to all the things I said I would change at the onset of the year? Not significantly much. There are still plenty of things that need to be done.

Hence a half year note to self on things I MUST do:

1. Visit an Opthalmologist. My sister insists that I need to have my eyes re-checked.
2. Visit a Dermatologist. I have never been to one. Let me clarify that, I've never consulted one about facial skin questions and treatments.
3. Visit a Dentist. Its been a while since I got back from my last trip...I have to get that dental prophylaxis done.
4. Start a Food journal. Yes, still part of an ongoing weight battle....I'm winning slightly but I think monitoriing my food and eating the right food would get me results faster (yes, I know, I know...low carb, high protein, low fat...)
5. Save. save. save. *sigh*

the little(?) things that spell C-R-A-P

we had our weekly sport event today...I think its been ongoing for 3 and a half months already....
so there we were playing as we always do...when we were told that we were past the time we've paid for...
oops, we lost track of the time...
but then they said we've been playing since 530...that means we've been playing for 2 hours!
no way! i know we were still in the office at 530, and the first player was at the venue a few minutes past 6.
okay, so we had 30 minutes excess...but not an hour!

that ordeal over and done with, i changed into sports shorts, a shirt and rubber flip flops and headed back to the office to get my other stuff. lo and behold, building staff at the ground floor told me that next time, i'd have to use the back entrance since I was dressed the way i was

excuse me?! it was 745 PM already...waaay past office hours.
plus I am clean...not like I have dirt and grime and sweat all over (which I did at one point in the past I believe)
plus i've been doing that for how many months already...why tell me now?
whats that? its ALWAYS been building policy?
oh yes, i've forgotten how absolutely exclusive the buiding is.
I'll make sure I remind myself that the next time I'm stuck in a long line of people snaking all the way out to the front door, waiting to get into the high tech elevators....
I'll also keep that in mind next time its meal time and there's no cafeteria to speak of.
exclusive people who work in the exclusive building ALWAYS dine at the expensive dining areas in the vicinity.

I dont belong here.

lost

I'll blog this now, because it will be over soon.

I'm back in the US, not staying long though. Just a week. The hard part about this short trip is that I'm supposed to squeeze in a lot of information on everything I'll be working on for the next few months, review some of the stuff I've worked on in the past week or so and on top of that, I have to deal with the long flights and the time difference.

In such a short span of time, I've managed to become extremely disoriented ...

At our port of entry we thought we missed the connecting flight because we were delayed an hour. We got out of customs and found out the connecting flight was delayed an hour as well.

After running to the gate, we were told the flight was cancelled and that we were to go to this other gate to get our new boarding passes.

From that other gate, we were led to yet another gate where we would board.

The following day, we first went to the tower opposite the actual tower where the office is. No hassle though, we found it eventually and we were greeted by the receptionist who didnt know who we were and werent expecting us.

Monday afternoon, I was starting to fall asleep at my desk.
Tuesday I seemed to have recovered.
This afternoon I WAS almost at my desk again (but seated upright still).

Yesterday I spoke to an NWA agent on the phone who said she could uprade me using my miles and then put me on hold for 20 minutes. This morning I called them to check on that and was told I couldnt upgrade because Business Class was full.

Earlier this evening, I stepped on the elevator, pressed 14 to get to my room and the elevator went straight to 16th! I pressed 14 again and when the doors opened, I was back at the lobby.

Some trip.

I AM VAIN!

...and so are YOU.

Admit it. Everyone loves to indulge in a little preening and primping every now and then.

If you've ever looked at a picture of yourself and reacted:

"Ang pangit ko!"
"Ang laki ng mukha ko"
"Mukha akong ewan"
"Mukha akong sabog"
"Ayoko na yan makita!"

Then it means you have a little bit of vanity in you.

And I dont think there'e anything wrong with that. There is a healthy dose of it. So long as it doesn't cause you to affect yourself or other people around you negatively, then I say, go ahead.

Be Vain.

Love yourself the way only you can.

sino daw??

http://www.myheritage.com

update

New old template. I'm getting bored with the available ones...but I dont really want to create my own...so I'll just keep changing it.

Company teambuilding was last weekend. It was okay...except it didnt really feel too outdoorsy for me. Bad timing kasi.

Leaving this Sunday and then returning the Sunday after that. Jetsetter? Not really. I just have no choice but to work.

hello.

I seem to lack ideas for posts lately.

I definitely dont have photos to share either.

Waiting. waiting. waiting.

I project that in three months time I will have a new toy. Hopefully.

I also project that around the time I'll be ready to acquire a new toy, I'll have to think five or more times before I go through with it. Parting is such sweet, sweet sorrow, see. Or in the case of parting with financial assets, its more sorrow than sweet. BUT, a new pal is always a welcome addition.

I also project that in the next month, I'll be posting a complaint that I havent had a good beach holiday. I have no one to blame but myself though. Myself and my lack of funds haha!

Yes, "lack" is a recurring theme.

Despite that though (or because of that?) I project that within the next week, I'll have an even longer list of "wants". With some "needs" included. I rarely can distinguish the two. And yeah, my "needs" tend to be ignored as "wants" sometimes. I'm frugal that way. Or should I say, "crazy" that way. I can see something with a letter "S" in that list. Starts with an "S" and ends with "S". And they come in pairs. Always, always. ALWAYS. They also come in various heel lenghts.

I project that in the next month, I'll be complaining about my weight. All this work and how much have I dropped in the last month and a half? Barely 2.

"Its because you eat, silly".

Oh yes. Weight loss means food loss and happiness lost. Not to mention weak knees. And hunger shakiness. And a general crabbiness as well. I eat because I work enough to burn 'em off, so BUG OFF!!


Oh yes. I have a shiny new ball. Its nice and round and red and blue all over. Muddy as well. Did I mention that summer's over? We've been playing in mud lately. Here come the rain again...*sigh* I need a beach holiday.

Yes.
Hello.
Welcome back to my blog.

I need a decent update soon.

earthquakes

In the few minutes before this, I have managed to squeeze in a quick chat with a friend now living overseas. We talked about my plans and whats been happening.

Honestly, I am scared. And I dont even have definite plans yet. I've always been afraid of taking that step...and I guess I have subconsciously been delaying it too. But I've said more than once (over and over again, in fact) that I WILL take that direction. Eventually.

Even now as I write about it, I feel little earthquakes running through my insides.
Someday, I dont know how soon, it will be my turn. And when that time comes, I will embrace it as openly as I can...while keeping those tremors invisible.

four years since

Its been four years since my last Holy Week here in Manila. I dont even remember what I did that time, though I can vaguely recall taking out the old, old film SLR on our annual Bisita Iglesia and taking Black and White photos of the kids.

This year, we went on another Bisita Iglesia, on Good Friday instead of Maundy Thursday (when is it supposed to be done anyway?) and without the fuss that we used to have. No packed lunches and no picnics off Rizal Park/CCP parking lots (there is a shortage of decent parks with trees in this country!). We went to four churches for the Stations of the Cross, had lunch at Chowking and then headed home. Any my sister and her kids weren't with us.

Black Saturday was the start of our Zambales overnight trip. We were heading there with the rest of my parent's and kuya's staff and their families (four rented jeepneys in all) , our van, and half of our kitchen I think. Travelling light is not an option for budget, big group excursions. So are trips requiring boat transfers. Hence, Zambales. The beach was crowded but the water was okay. Its not Boracay, but hey, its the beach!

It was only when Ally commented that the water was too salty that I realized that she's never been to the beach. I dont recall whether Carl has been, but I dont think he's been either. My nephew and niece lead such deprived lives. Buti nalang nagkaron ng excursion yung mga taga Bulacan. I think they enjoyed it, despite bucketfuls of sand in their bathing suits and saltwater in their system. I lathered them with sunblocked prior to each exposure, so no painful redness there....I do hope they get to go to the beach again soon. And with their cousins too, that way they'd enjoy it more.

For that trip, I borrowed Allan's cam with the casing so we could play with it. My favorite shots of the kids are those where they were underwater....they're off not really focused, but I guess I'm just glad they've been to the beach.

More photos from the trip in my flickr gallery.

I guess that starts off my Summer in Manila. More happenings are coming my way soon, I hope.

one off my list :D

I can finally cross off one of the places on my "where to go list"...I've been to Mt Pinatubo!!!

I started writing a really long entry describing the entire experience, when I realized that I would rather post pictures. Hence, no long narratives here...just photos and a few comments here and there.

(But for those who want to read more, of if you've seen this want to know a little more, head off to Allan's entry)





Our rented 4x4 splashing its way through Crow Valley...formerly Lahar territory








After a 40 minute 4x4 ride comes the 2 hour (or so) walk to the crater under the heat of the sun and amidst breathtaking scenery.




All that walking was well worth it...up at the top, you're greeted by Mt Pinatubo's crater lake...its not as blue green as it used to be because of recent rain and landslide...and maybe even volcanic activity. It is an active volcano after all...and the fact that we were there at the site of what used to be boiling hot lava and the source of immense destruction...its simply indescribable.






Those who braved the heat and the walk have to be rewarded with a souvenir shot.....

...and with 30 minutes of nap time buried under volcanic ash (in the Korean-owned Spa Town).

Ano na kayang pwedeng isunod sa listahan?

Over the weekend my parents and I visited what I had always wanted for myself.

I did tell myself to be cautious on my way there, to not get my hopes up, that my being there was just the first step to getting the dream, it was for research.

But having seen it, and then realizing that I am so far away from getting it still just disturbed me.

Its a goal I know. But I have to find out how I'll get there. I need options. I need a way. I have to be enlightened.

nature calling

Picture 090, originally uploaded by socs.

Updated for Grache.

It was a trip arranged by Verchie for his officemates and Allan and I were tagging along so we'd know if its something that we can arrange for SOAR (mental note: that name needs to be replaced).

The place: La Mesa Eco Park. Its surprisingly very nearby. And surprisingly full of trees. Yes, we have an honest to goodness nature place an hour away from Ortigas. Or Makati. Depends on the traffic really. Its near Fairview. And its for real.

We went to the nature trail part of it and the above photo is of the actual watershed where most of the Metro gets their water supply. Yes people, there are people out there looking after our water and making sure the surrounding areas are optimized for a watershed.

Just dont ask me about the park area for the place. Thats where most families go to for the Picnic grounds and the pool and an Orchidarium among other things. That will be explored next time.

More photos at my flickr gallery.

where have all those fridays gone?

as I sit here waiting for Allan to finish work, its only natural that I get to thinking about the old days

no work was OT enough to cause me to miss a night out. well okay, I exaggerate, but I almost always had plans on Friday night. or not having a plan did not last long. nowadays it starts with "san tayo pupunta?" which eventually leads to "uwi nalang"

its the lethal combination of katamaran at kawalan...magastos lumabas e, uwi nalang. Madami pa kong kailangan asikasuhin na bayaran.

oh well. maybe this is temporary. or maybe not. no loss, things are still good, and life is still, in general, somewhat fun.

half-blind, fully off

I had a feeling my right and left contacts got switched when the canisters turned over before I had the chance to put the R and L lid on them last night (they were still dry so the lens didnt fall off). I tried to reenact the turning over in order to find out if they did get switched and which was which, but then I gave up and figured it would be pointless trying to determine that.

And so my "off" day started last night actually. Because this morning I put on my lenses and my left eye just wasnt seeing right (err..you know what I mean) and, I was singing "Monday, bloody Monday" in Sumi's car as we wove our way around Edsa. All throughout the trip, I kept telling myself I looked like a Hollywood star on the pages of paparazzi-photo infested magazines evading the unwelcome cameras: hair all tousled, lips covered in bright red to match my stilletos, sunglasses perched atop my nose, lips sporting a perpetual pout.....

But a quick look at the side mirror told me otherwise, so much for fooling myself...

I wasnt really tired, not really disoriented either..and well, laziness doesnt exactly feel the same. I was just "off" --- and I had terrible imagination too (Hollywood? Paparazzi?? ME????!? duh!).

I had breakfast and coffee...but that didnt help any.
I even read the morning paper just to ease myself into the day. I think that didnt help either.
Come lunch time it was the same, only I was getting used to it (frustrated by it still, but not unfamiliar).

And then our ever reliable coffee machine came to the rescue. A big mugful of brew revived me slowly. By midafternoon I was fine.

But the events of last night and this morning just wont go away. As I stepped into the ladies' to change for Monday Night Boxing, I found out that my half-blind self forgot to pack gym socks. And I'm wearing my red open toe shoe sans socks (naturally).

Therefore, the conclusion of this lovely start of the week, is well, nothing. No boxing, nothing productive and probably a headache later tonight because of the contacts.

That and a reminder that my puny little nose cant ever hold up big beautiful dark sunglasses that grace the cover of so many magazines.

Happy Monday, all.

weeks and weeks ago...

I never really got to share any of the photos I took during the Pyro Olympics at MOA last month. I guess I just wasnt happy with most of them.

BUT...since I've been posting almost daily lately..I'd like to keep that trend going :D

Here's one that I think is kinda okay...

I miss my Buddy. I need a new camera :(

smile for the camera

I realized I havent posted any recent photos of myself with the girls so I decided to choose from a batch of really funny photos from last christmas. Jaque's camera could take multiple shots with only seconds in between and we ended up playing with that function.

A lot of the photos were funny and had us with weird facial expressions and doing all sorts of stuff....but I guess this one's "safest" to post....no one will complain that they look silly...except maybe renee :p

today's learnings

number 1

Jamih introduced me to something new today...the "wife cake".

No, its not something his future wife baked for him, but it is apparently an honest to goodness chinese pastry (na lasang hopia, mas masarap nga lang ng konti) and it really is called that. The nifty little things were packed individually and in a box with chinese drawings and the legend that goes with it, nicely printed on one of the box leaves...

And since Allan has introduced me to "Google-ing" everything, I googled and I found two stories about why it is called such. One story matched that on the box, and another, well, sounded a little too made up. Wikipedia has the nicer version (the same one I read on the box).

number 2

Ben introduced me to the wonderful world of Eclipse!! Lets see how long I can agree with it being "wonderful" (geeky geeky...cant help it, LEARN ako e :p )

number 3

I realized today that I now know I can deal with it. It really doesnt matter what happened in the past, people always find ways to cope. And hopefully, if you're honest enough to yourself and to other people, there won't be a significant amount of negativity no matter what may have occured. Time flies, people change...and hopefully, people learn too. I've learned...a lot...I think they have too, even just a little bit. Though some things are not the same as they used to be, things have evolved, just as they should.

'tis the season to be anyway

I just got an email at work about the yearly Valentine event we have here --- Its a fund raiser for various social events (and we need funds because we have so many events!) --- and I just remembered how Allan and I almost became "part" of that event.

The reason why its an "almost" is an old story, and I wont relay it again. I was just surprised ("aliw" surprised, that is) that this is still alive. Let's see how "Eternal" the link really is...I will make it a yearly habit to revisit that page...

Hey, its Valentine's day after all, I CAN post stuff like this right? :p

gusto ko !

madami akong gustong gawin at gustong puntahan
pero
madami rin akong dahilan.

ndi ko pa na p plano ng maayos e.
tinatamad ako.
sinu sino isasama?
wala akong budget e.
next time nalang siguro?
ndi ko alam kung pano pumunta dun.

hay naku. ang hirap talaga maging tamad.
tamad at poor.


PERO
ndi ako tinatamad mag type ngayon.
kaya ililista ko nalang.
pwede kayo nalang mag plano tas sama nalang ako?

BATANES!
sagada / banawe
palawan
wallclimbing
dive
driving school
camsur
donsol
cambodia
egypt
greece
london
bumalik sa paris
mag shopping to the max (budget budget budget!)
corregidor
mt. pinatubo
taal volcano

hot air balloon fest '07

souvenir shot
Originally uploaded by socs.

I originally did not want to go because it meant getting up really early in the morning...but I didnt have anything to do that day, and I had a film SLR to use anyway...so why not?

I went with Iam, Ge, Ruth, Ben and Manny.

Mahirap mag kwento,I'll leave it up to Iam to do the story telling. In the meantime, I've posted some photos (with me in them) in my flickr for sharing. Photos are by Manny P and Ruthie.

haay.
wala lang.

its another one of them days.
little things. its always the little things it seems.

written January 29, 2007

I have a new favorite. I started out with McDonald's breakfast mornings that were conducive to reading the newspaper and not much else. But I didnt complain. It provided me with the needed refuge (dare I say "escape"?) I always seem to crave.

And then I dropped by Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf on an urge to Brunch one day. I’ve always loved the place, but the afternoon presence of crowds and noisy groups did not appeal to me as much. This visit though, I was surprised to find several other people with laptops and/or books reading, studying and surfing away. There was soothing piped in music and great coffee (and Chai Latte!) and the salads are good too. I found my seat in a corner table and realized that I have finally found my perfect getaway on weekends and on mornings when I just need to get away. And its just a jeep away from home!

Just a few minutes ago, when I sat down to write (yes, I am here – was there – as of this writing) I felt all the energy and drive return. Here, I can write again! Here, I can make my plans! I felt revived and happy, and all I needed was a small round table to myself, air conditioning, good coffee, good food and a serene area.
Now all I need is a laptop so I can use the wifi :-D

looking back and looking forward

I'm leaving in a few minutes, so I'll make this as quick (yet abstract still) as possible.

This was last year. Tomorrow will be the beginning of next year :)

that KL incident

I promised I would write about this..so here goes.

Last week was KL week. We signed up for that Air Asia promo last November so we can go somewhere different. It was a trip with the girls Jaque, Renee and April (Macel passed) with Allan and myself.
Weeks before, I started the quest for a hotel that fit the budget and was in an ideal location. At first it was fun....eventually, I started getting confused...and then frustrated...and then finally, indecisive. The girls and I attempted to distribute responsibilities. Someone researched accomodation, someone took care of airport transfers, another one for places to visit and another for local transportation options.

We had a plan...but time was running out. With work and other personal obligations, I ended up booking the hotel three days before departure, reserving the seats to and from Clark two days before and I started packing 6 hours before the shuttle was scheduled to leave Megamall.
But we made it to the Shuttle and in time found ourselves in Clark lining up for Travel Tax payment. And then disaster struck.

The lady told me she'd wait until the check in counter accepts my passport...apparently my passport was valid for only four more months..and the airline specified that it should be for at least 6 months!!

So there I was waiting in line, knowing deep down that they wouldnt allow it. They would check my passport before leaving, and if by some miracle I get past that, KL would still check my passport as well. I stood there imagining I was hitting myself in the head. I wanted to bang my head against the wall if only I didnt think security would drag me out of the airport. All this time I was preparing for group concerns for the trip, I completely overlooked my own passport! I was able to book a hotel and get an idea of trains and buses and whatnots in KL...but my passport was about to expire in four months! I've been travelling, I KNOW that. But now that travel is for personal reasons, the trip is in jeopardy??

But anyway, long story short. The lady didnt check me in. The girls went ahead and checked in. I ran to DFA with Allan, spoke to two security guards (one of them was totally irritating) spoke to two Information personnel and spoke to a lady who was in an inside office to no avail. It was airline procedure. They could not give me anything that would convince them to let me board.

So back to the airport we went. Hung out with the girls before they boarded...even went to the DOT desk at the Airport arrival to see if we can find something else to do for the weekend. All this time I was berating myself for being SOOOO STUPID. Not only did I ruin my planned vacation, but I ruined Allan's too. And I guess to a certain extent, the girls' too. Not to mention the financial implications of not boarding the flight, not showing up at a hotel after reservations, taking a shuttle to and from Clark....etc etc.

I went home dreading people's reactions. I knew then that any future trip, international or otherwise would bring people back to the fact that I forgot about my passport validity. But, like I told some people, I am consoling myself with the fact that because of this, I, nor anyone who knows (and who finds it immensely funny) my story, will never be denied boarding for the same reason. I guess ultimately, something good has to come out of it.

Its a new year, you'd think you'd be faced with new challenges, new opportunities, new excitement....instead, I'm faced with the same old problems I'd hope would fade with each year I age.

Yes. The lousiest and most pathetic dilemma anyone can think of for someone at my age, in my position and with my background haunts me. Its expected and surprising at the same time.

I guess thats what happens when you try to run away from coming up with a solution. Problems are never solved by time.

Its a recurring theme, that wanting to get out of a box, feeling like you're finally about to....only to discover that there are some strings that are yet to be cut. But the question that haunts me over and over again is whether or not those are meant to be cut once and for all. If they are, when and at what point ? Sure, it might free me up...but will that nagging feeling of guilt and responsibility that I know is inevitable ever disappear?
If they're not, how do I balance me and them at the same time? Sometimes I feel like those two cannot and cannot co-exist. The only way I see it co-existing is if they give a little. Though what I think is little is actually not for them. Its an entire history of respect and roots and affiliation gone blown into completely unreasonable proportions.

I am speaking in tongues again. That tongue that refuses to call it by what it is. Aahh well. Like I said, the new year does not necessarily bring new things.

*happy* 2007.

nothing yet, just this for now

sam 1
Originally uploaded by socs.

Happy New Year!