thoughts on the past year

As I write this I am eating out by myself...it has been a while since I last dined out by myself. In fact, I can't even remember when the last time was. It must've been back in Manila because I don't remember eating out alone in Dublin.

This probably explains why I don't have decent blog entries. I think despite being alone, I haven't actually spent much time being by myself. Well, not the typical alone time that allows me to think and write.

So what has been happening to me in the past one year and (almost) one month? The obvious answer, I've lived in an apartment for one year, and I've moved out of that apartment into a new one. It's smaller and slightly cheaper but much nicer I think. It will be my home for the next year, after I which I'm pretty sure I'll be moving again...Allan and I would probably need more closet space.

Also an obvious answer, Allan and I are still in two different countries, despite the fact that we've gotten married. It was not easy last year and it's still not easy now. But we do what we have to do and we deal with the difficulties because, well, we have to.

The less obvious answer, and something that I've admitted to myself just now is that the past year has been struggling to force some sense of normalcy in my life. I've been trying to get a balance between working on weekdays and establishing a "life" for me here. I signed up for the gym in order to get me to do something other than work, but in the past month, that has blown up in my face. I've gotten frustrated over forcing myself to go. The fact that I tell myself to go makes me not want to go. I am a rebellious teenager rebelling against myself. In the past weeks though, I’ve been feeling a familiar restlessness come over me more and more. The “old” me who never stayed put on weekends is slowly making itself felt again. I hear that voice inside that says you should be out and about instead of moping around. I haven’t fully entertained that thought yet, but I think I will need to in the next year.

I guess that overall, while this past year has been extremely significant for me, it has put other pieces of my life on hold. I think most of the time I spent away from home, here in Dublin, seem like lost time. Nothing seemed to have happened, and I was functioning as though on auto pilot…..I want my life to start again.

one year later

One year ago today, I spent my first day in Dublin...and maybe a few more days before that, I may have written my last decent blog entry.  I've moved countries and lost the ability to blog.

Oh well, I think I'll post this photo instead (taken sometime January this year I think).

Welcome to Dublin!

Allan finally arrives in Dublin.  Not to stay, but only to visit for two weeks.  His first few days included struggling with recovery from the long flight and the shock of the soon-to-be-winter weather.  As a result, our first weekend was slow sightseeing-wise, but he's been to the shopping areas and have done some tours of the cities, so I think most of the important Dublin places are covered.

Photos are starting to pile up, but not as much as I had thought.  Tomorrow, we drive West though..and I expect thats when most shots will be taken.  For now, here's my favorite portrait: